You’re probably expecting me to say that I bet Kate Middleton is jealous of Meghan Markle: her public speaking abilities, her confidence, her sex appeal, her beauty, her sparkle in the spotlight. Or maybe you think I’m going to say that I bet Meghan Markle is jealous of Kate Middleton: her position in the royal family, her beautiful children, her ability to bounce back to her pre-pregnancy body, her impeccable fashion sense, her poise and elegance…but I have something else to say…
I was one of those people glued to my screen at 2am (yes, 2 am—I had to see all the guests arriving!) watching the Royal Wedding of Harry and Meghan. It was such a fun experience for me. Everyone was asleep and I got to watch it all by myself without interruption and not only ooo and awe over what I saw but also reminisce about my own wedding. The whole day for me just felt romantic and lovely, as if I had been a guest. It was so fun to call my Mom after and share our thoughts on everything from the guests and the flowers to the dress and the music.
But that’s where it ended, on the phone with my Mom. A private conversation.
What shocked me was what I read online about Meghan’s choices that very afternoon. People’s opinions on the style of her dress, the way her dress fit, her messy bun, her no make-up look. I couldn’t believe how quick people were to publish their negative opinions on the internet for the whole world (and potentially Meghan!) to read. We have all gone to weddings where there was something we didn’t like, be it the main course or the DJ or the dress the mother-of-the-bride wore. But in real life we just complain to our spouse or girlfriends, we don’t publish an article about it! How devastating that would be for a bride to log on the day after her wedding and read all kinds of mean tweets about needing a bobby pin or another dress fitting. So why is it that because this was a televised event people felt compelled and permitted to share their nasty opinions online?
Some would argue that as a celebrity, criticism is fair game. But why does being well known or popular mean that someone deserves to be bullied? Then there’s the argument that we have free speech and should be allowed to say whatever we want about whomever we want. But why does having free speech mean we have a right to be nasty to someone? Defending the right to be cruel, mean, critical, and judgmental about a woman’s wedding day, the happiest day of her life and the day she has dreamed about, does not seem like a good reason to me. Her dress was exactly what she wanted, her hair her favourite way, her flowers her favourite kind—of course it’s not going to be what you or I would have chosen because she is not us!
Why can’t we just be happy for Meghan, even if her choices were not the Royal Wedding of our imaginations? Why are we so jealous that we would cut down a woman on her wedding day and publish mean comments about her on the internet within moments of seeing her walk down the aisle? Why must we invent an imaginary feud between sisters-in-law and declare a winner in every category of battle of the Royal Weddings? It’s quite astonishing how mean spirited our society is.
I was looking for a quote that came to mind but I couldn’t find it, so I will paraphrase: A flower in bloom is no less beautiful because another flower blooms beside it. That’s how I feel about Meghan and Kate. Yes, both women have exciting, glamorous, fancy events in their lives and a lot of money and resources at their disposal. But we all have good things in our lives, too, and we are not in competition with them and they are not in competition with each other. It’s time we all turn down the meanness that so easily comes out on the internet and just be kind. We can keep our opinions to ourselves, or at the very least, off the internet: if you have nothing nice to say/blog/tweet, say/blog/tweet nothing at all. Whatever happened to that!?
Now, in the spirit of positivity, love, kindness and just genuine joy for another woman’s special day, I thought I’d share a few pictures of the three Royal Weddings of the past decade: Meghan, Kate and Sophia. Kate and Will were married one year before me, and now Meghan and Harry almost six years later. It’s actually our wedding anniversary next week and I have been filled with such romance and nostalgia since watching the wedding last month, so this gives me a good way to get some pictures up—there was not a drop of turquoise at my wedding, can you believe that? Like all brides, my wedding day was so special and I felt like an absolute princess, pure royalty. But the best part of all was marrying my true love. Meghan and Kate have a lot of wonderful things to be envious of, but nobody fills my heart and soul with love like my man. He is mine, I am his and that’s all I could ever want.